I suppose I could have done the 'safe' thing and stayed in doors until the fog lifted, but where is the fun in that? I think its important for us to experience as much as we can while we are here, we are here for such a short time in the grand scale of things so, pack as much in as you can while you can, even if it is as small as a dog walk in the fog, who would want to miss scenes like these....
I have been a little cranky this week, I still haven't had a delivery from RNIB, I sent them a email on Sunday and the automatic reply said they would reply to me within one working day, Tuesday I still hadn't heard from them so I got on the phone, they were very sympathetic and after a lot of chatter the guy on the other end of the phone thinks that the electronic magnifier is out of stock so this is delaying my whole order, frankly, I am a little pissed off, I placed the order on the 8th September and the whole order was in stock, they took over £400 out of my bank account two days later, today is the 14th October! The very last thing that was said to me on Tuesday was, we will send you a email to let you know what's happening, today, like I said, is Friday, and nooooo flipping email!!
Anyway, I had the hump, but I needed to go in to town to buy contact lens solution, so, off I go on the bus to town.....I should have stayed home!
As I am sure I have told you guys before, my contact lenses are hard gas per minable, soft contact lenses just cannot be made strong enough to give me as much sight as I have right now, and the lenses in my glasses are so thick and still don't give me as much vision as my contacts. I use a solution from Boots that I have used for years, its like a peroxide solution, you squirt solution into the pot, put my contacts into the little cradle thingy and there is a little disk at the bottom of the pot that reacts with the solution, the little cradle thingy screws into the solution pot and it fizzes like mad, sterilises, cleans and removes protein from my contacts, the only draw back is that you have to leave them in the solution for at least 6 hours, but that's not really a problem for me. The solutions that you can get where you have a little pot, squirt the solution in the pot and then clean your lenses with the solution, you are supposed to put a lens in the palm of your hand, put some solution on top and then rub it well with a finger, this is fine, and works great for some people, BUT for me and loads of others, as soon as that contact lens is out of my eye, I cant see bugger all, all that rubbing the lens is firstly wayyyy to fiddly, then if I drop it I am in trouble, I cant put my glasses on because I cant take both contacts out at the same time as then I run the risk of getting them the wrong way around, or loosing them both!
A couple of months ago I noticed that it was getting harder to buy my solution from boots...
This is the stuff I use, when I first enquired about it, I was told they had low stock but more would be coming soon, fab, so every where I went I looked for a Boots and checked out the situation, I found some when I was in Suffolk at the start of the summer holidays, so I brought a couple of bottles (they last a month), now I am running low again, so I popped into Boots where they told me that they had moved some their solutions to Boots opticians shops, so, off I trundle to Boots opticians, when I enquired I was told, in a slightly snotty tone, that Boots no longer stock that particular solution as it is being miss used and is dangerous....MISS USED FOR WHAT???
So, I give her my sweetest smile, which probably looked a lot like I had wind, and said, 'ok then, so what do you intend to put in place for people like me then who rely on this form of solution?'.....Silence....a long long silence, so I crossed my arms, lent on one leg and said, you are a massive company and as far as I can see you are catering for people who use disposable or soft lenses, there is nothing on your shelves today that you can offer me in place of my usual solution, what am I supposed to do?......she says...'so, which hospital are you under?'.....what I wanted to say was WTF has that got to do with anything and mind your own business, but I said...'Moorfields, London' the look in her eyes said...'shit!' , she then suggested I rang them and asked them what I should do......woman, I have wasted toooo much time talking to you, you are supposed to be a professional, I know exactly what I will be doing next. I went across the road to a independent opticians, who had exactly the same solution on their shelves, produced by the same company but in different packaging and unfortunately quite a bit dearer than Boots, but I am relived to say I have three months contact lens solution.
Different bottle, same stuff!
Not a very good photo of my glasses, but you can sort of see how thick the lenses are.
Anyway, I came home feeling a bit fed up really.
Its funny how things worry you without you really realising you are worrying about it, I had a call from Bedfordshire mental health and wellbeing service, They wanted to talk about my referral and to talk about what sort of support they could offer me. So, Thursday at 11am, I had another call from a guy from the team and we had a meeting over the phone that lasted about 45 mins, he asked lots of questions and we talked about some of the worries and very lightly touched on some of the 'trauma'. He was very easy to talk to and I felt comfortable being totally honest with him. Towards the end of the meeting he talked about the different services they offer, there is two major services with three different ways of delivering the service within those criteria's. The first is counselling, but he thought, as do I, that this will not benefit me, and the other is cognitive behaviour therapy, 1 being a group therapy, 2 was a mix of online support and the 3rd is like a 1-1 service, I am going for the 3rd option. He gave me the option of choosing a male or female therapist, I don't think I am bothered either way at the moment, this might change when it comes down to discussing the nitty gritty. But we will see! According to this guy, CBT is more of a practical approach, and has better results longer term, which is what I want, I want to feel better about life. He used a way of talking that I could really relate too. He said often our thoughts are like airing cupboards, we keep stuffing towels and sheets in until it becomes so full that the door keeps popping open, all of the contents need to come out, be folded up and replaced neatly...that sums things up exactly. The waiting list is about four months and you are offered 8 to 10 sessions, I don't mind waiting, this crap has been floating around in my head for 26 years few more months wont make much difference.
I hope this blog makes sense, I am way to tried to try to read it back tonight, so sorry for any spelling mistakes, and speak to you soon x
No comments:
Post a Comment